The Izaya Watching Room
by ANimEisAweSOmE4400
Summary: Namie wanted to know what happens when Izaya is left alone. She bugs his phone and puts up cameras and has a room to watch him in. Izaya does some hilarious things when no one is watching. Warning : Izaya's imagination and nasty situations.
1. Welcome To The Izaya Watching Room

A.N. This is actually my Aunts story. She wanted me to post it for her.

She says…"I do not own the brilliance that is Durarara or any of the characters."

The Izaya Watching Room

Izaya's secretary Namie Yagiri wondered what Izaya did when he was left alone. So, she put up camera's all over his apartment and bugged his phone. She made a secret room to watch him in. She calls it, " The Izaya Watching Room."

Izaya was typing on his computer, when he looked up at Namie.

"Hey, Namie?" He asked.

"What?" She replied, disinterested.

"Do you have any plans for today?" Izaya asked smiling.

"Yes, Izaya I do." She told him.

"Really? Like what exactly?" He wondered.

"I have quite a few errands to run." She answered.

"Like?" He asked her, annoyed to have to repeat himself.

"None of your business." She looked at the clock. "I'd better get going." She said, putting down her book and getting off the couch.

Izaya glared at her as she headed towards the door.

"Please leave the room Izaya." She thought to herself.

Izaya stood up and headed for the bathroom. Once he was inside, Namie opened Izaya's front door and shut it. She then turned towards a giant picture and opened it, revealing a medium sized room with computer screens. She entered the room and shut the picture behind her.

She went over to the computer screens, just in time to see Izaya washing his hands. She sat down and began to watch his every move.

Izaya walked into the living room and looked around to make sure he was truly alone. He smiled…he was. (Or so he thought)

Namie watched as Izaya skip over to his expensive black leather couch, and started jumping on it.

"What is he? 10?" Namie smiled.

Someone began knocking on the front door. Izaya stopped bouncing and frowned. He jumped down and walked over to the door, where, Mairu and Kururi burst through the door the second Izaya turned the knob.

"Hiya, Izaya!" Mairu smiled.

"Huh? Oh…you two. What do you want?" He asked annoyed.

"We have some girl things we need to discuss with Namie." They said together.

"Ew. I don't want to know!" Izaya shuddered. Not that it was a gross subject for him. But it was weird when it included his sisters.

"Is she here?" Kururi asked.

"Nope. She went out. She said she had to run a few errands." He told them.

"Aww…well then…can you go get my camera please?" Mairu asked.

"Fine!" He snapped and headed towards his room. (He borrowed it a few days ago)

The twins bolted for Namie's secret room and joined her. They watched as Izaya came out with Mairu's camera.

"Where'd they go?" Izaya wondered aloud. He dropped the camera and looked around for them.

Mairu growled. "He dropped my new camera! I'll destroy him!"

"I'll buy you a new one if it's broken." Namie told her.

Mairu hugged her.

All three of them watched as Izaya looked in the most ridiculous places for his sisters.

Izaya opened his DVD player. "Kururi?" He closed it. He then walked over to his cat, Mayonaka. ( I know he doesn't have a cat. But he needs one for this story.) He opened Mayonaka's mouth and peeked inside. "Mairu?" He released the cat, who ran and hid under the couch. He crossed his arms and looked around. When he didn't find them, he shrugged. He walked over to his desk and accidentally stepped on Mairu's camera. Shattering it to pieces. He looked to see what he just stepped on and panicked. "Aw crap! Mairu's going to be pissed!" he fretted.

He grabbed a broom and swept the pieces under a rug. "There." He smiled, satisfied with his brilliance.

"What an idiot!" Namie laughed.

Mairu and Kururi smiled. "Yeah…he is…but for some questionable reason…we love him." Kururi giggled.

They continued to watch the screen.

Izaya was sitting at his desk and looking at his computer. He began picking his nose. When he removed his finger from his left nostril, there was a nasty green squishy booger on it. He looked down and examined it. "Ew." He said.

He stood up and began going through a stack of books. He picked one up. " The Asian Guy That Turned Red?" He asked confused. He put it down and picked up another one. "The Asian Guy That Turned Red 2?" He put that one down, too. He soon chose two more. He read the titles. "A Day In The Life Of A Fish? What the hell?" He looked at the other one, "OMG A Fork? Where did these come form?" He looked for more. He wanted to find the perfect book for Namie's little present. He choose some more. " The Beaver And The Butthead?" he rejected that one, and looked at the next. " The Masturbating Pirate That Teaches Origami?" He smiled. "Sounds good. I'll have to read that one later." He looked at the last book in his hand. " The Amazing Green Super Booger?" He looked at his finger. Then at the book. Then back to his finger. "Interesting."

He sighed and put that one down too. He almost gave up. But then he saw it. The perfect book. It was sitting on the couch. "Perfect." He smiled.

"What the hell is he doing to my book?" Namie almost screamed.

They watched as Izaya put his booger inside the book and then shut it.

"Ew." Said Kururi.

"I'm gonna kill him!" Hissed Namie.

Izaya skipped back to his chair and sat down. "Now I'm bored."

As if right on cue, someone else knocked on the door.

Izaya smiled. "It's open!" He called.

Shizuo walked in. "Mairu are you here? I need to borrow your camera." He called.

Izaya looked at him from his desk. "Sorry Shizu-Chan, she's not here. Can I take a message?"

"Yeah! Here's one for you." Shizuo ran over to him and knocked him off his chair. The proceeded to kick Izaya in the groin.

Izaya got up and ran to the bathroom to check himself, while Shizuo went to leave. The picture opened up and Mairu and Kururi pulled him in, closing it behind them.

"What the hell is going on?" He asked, sitting in one of the many chairs.

"I made this room to watch what Izaya does when he's alone. He can be quite…interesting." Namie laughed.

"What do you mean by 'interesting'?" Shizuo asked.

"Just watch Shizuo!" Mairu pointed to the screen.

Izaya was in the bathroom, looking and feeling down his pants. "Good. The boys are alright. I was worried one of them popped." Izaya sighed in relief.

Izaya left the bathroom and went back into the other room. He looked around.

"Now where did Shizu-Chan go? Why does everyone I love, leave me?" He cried. But then he stopped.

"Mayonaka? Help me find Shizu-Chan!" He yelled at the cat who was rubbing up against his leg. The cat looked at him and then yawned. Then it went and jumped up on the sofa, where it proceeded to lick itself.

Izaya stared…fascinated. "Hey! I wanna do that!" He smiled and sat down next to his cat, where he began to mimic the cat.

He watched the cat, and was instantly freaked out enough to fall off the couch. The cat had it's leg in the air while it licked it's toes.

"AH! You're a self-creeper Mayonaka!" Izaya freaked and ran to the phone.

Shizuo, Namie, Mairu and Kururi were laughing hard. Shizuo fell of his chair.

Izaya punched in the phone numbers and waited for an answer.

"Hello?"

"Shinra? It's Izaya."

"Oh hi Izaya. What's up?"

"Dude…I think my cat's possessed or something! Can you come look at it?"

"Izaya? I'm a human doctor. I don't do animals."

"Please? I'm freaking out!"

"Alright Izaya. Celty and I will be there shortly."

"Thanks!"

Izaya hung up and darted over to the bookcase to hide Celty's head. He began pacing like mad until they arrived.

A short while later…

Izaya pulled the two inside when they arrived.

"Alright Izaya. Where's your possessed cat?" Shinra laughed.

Celty shook with laughter.

"He's over there!" Izaya screamed, pointing at the mass of black fur. It was licking it's toes again.

Shinra looked at it. "Why do you think it's possessed Izaya?" Shinra questioned.

"How else would it be able to do that?" Izaya asked.

"All cats do that. Cats are very flexible creatures." Shinra explained.

"Oh! Okay then." Izaya grinned.

Celty couldn't stay there another minute. She headed for the door and got pulled inside Namie's secret room.

"Welcome to the Izaya Watching Club Celty!" Shizuo said.

"Huh?" She thought.

"Alright Izaya. I'll see you later." Shinra said heading for the door.

"Bye." Izaya said, going into another room.

Celty opened the picture door and pulled Shinra in.

"What's going on?" He asked.

"We're watching my big brother act stupid." Mairu laughed.

"Care to join us?" Shizuo laughed.

"Most certainly!" Shinra smiled.

They all watched the screen.

Izaya was in his room and pulled out a box from under his bed. He carried it out to the living room.

"What's in the box?" Asked Namie.

"Don't know." Said Kururi.

So they all watched.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Izaya opened the box and pulled out…

"BARBIES?" Everyone laughed.

"Alright…let's see who we have here…me…" He pulled out a Ken doll that looked exactly like him. Same cloths and everything. "Celty…" a Barbie that looked like her. "Namie, Shizu-Chan, Shinra, Kururi, and…and…OH NO! WHERE"S MAIRU?…Oh…there she is!" All the dolls looked exactly like the real thing.

He picked up the Celty doll and the Shinra doll.

Celty Doll: I don't love you anymore Shinra!

Shinra Doll: Why not?

Celty Doll: Because you love Izaya's sisters! You perv!

Shinra Doll: Fine! But no one else could love a headless freak!

Celty Doll: I know someone who does!

Shinra Doll: Oh? Who?

Izaya picks up Shizuo doll.

Shizuo Doll: Celty… lose the zero and get with the hero.

Celty Doll: Oh Shizu-Chan…you're so strong.

Shinra Doll: Get outta here you skank!

*Celty and Shizuo dolls walk away*

"Uh…what the hell?" Shinra growled.

*Puts down Celty and Shinra dolls*

*Picks up Namie and Izaya dolls*

Namie Doll: Oh…Izaya. You're so hott!

Izaya Doll: Yes…I know.

Namie Doll: Do you want me Izaya?

Izaya Doll: Maybe if you stop crushing on your younger brother. It's gross!

Namie blushed.

Namie Doll: Alright! Seiji is no longer my dream guy. You are Izaya!

*Make out*

Namie gags.

Izaya's phone started to ring.

Izaya dropped his dolls and ran to the phone.

"Hello?"

"Hey it's Masaomi!"

"Oh hey! What cha need Kida?"

"I'm coming over. I need to discuss something with you, and my phone is dying."

"Alright I'll be waiting."

"Bye"

Izaya quickly put his toys away and sat next to his cat on the couch. Who was still licking itself. "freaky Feline!" he smirked and put the cat in his lap.

-KNOCKING ON HIS DOOR-

"Come in."

Masaomi came in and sat across from Izaya.

"When did you get a cat?" Masaomi asked.

"Hmmmm…I think it's Mairu and Kururi's cat." Izaya said.

"Who?" Masaomi asked confused.

"My sisters."

"You have sisters." Masaomi asked.

"Yeah. Two of them. They go to Rira Academy too." Izaya told him.

"Hmm…anyways…"

Mairu and Kururi looked at each other.

"Is it yours?" Asked Mairu.

"No. Yours?" Asked Kururi.

"Nope."

They looked at Namie.

"Yours?" They asked together.

"Not mine either." Namie answered them.

"Then where'd it come from?" They wondered.

Celty typed on her PDA

"Izaya has some serious issues. He needs to seek out some professional help." Everyone agreed.

"Come on…Izaya can be a wonderful big brother. Trust me, if Kururi or I were ever in danger…he would do anything to save us." Mairu explained seriously.

"True. True." Smile Kururi.

"But he's still a complete idiot though." Shizuo said.

"Yep." They all said.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Izaya was laughing with Masaomi. " And they think I don't know about their secret room!" Izaya told him.

"HAHAHAHAHA!" Masaomi fell off the couch.

"I've know this whole time and have been playing dumb." Izaya grinned.

THE END

Well what did you think? Did you like it or not? By the way…the books mentioned earlier are books I've written. Review Please and I'll send you a bunch of RAMEN and POCKY! And maybe even SUSHI! Thank You! ^^


	2. Super Izaya, Pirates, and Izaya's friend

A/N: Here is the second chapter of my aunts story. She says, " If I get 10 reviews I'll make another chapter. It will be Izaya as you've never see him before. I do not own Durarara or any of it's characters."

The Izaya Watching Room

Chapter 2

Izaya was laying on his couch watching TV, when Namie came into the room and turned it off.

"Hey!" Izaya protested.

"Oh shut it!" Namie snapped. She got right in his face. "Izaya? Care to explain why there's a booger in my copy of War and Peace?"

Izaya looked at her with the most innocent of looks. "I haven't any idea. Maybe the cleaning lady hates you?" He asked her.

"That might be it…except…" She began.

"Except what?" He asked.

"Except…YOU DON'T HAVE A CLEANING LADY, IZAYA!" She shouted.

Izaya looked desperately for a way out of the situation. He glanced at the clock and grinned.

"Sorry about your problems Namie, but I got to go." Izaya said, standing from his couch and heading towards his front door.

"Not so fast Izaya! Where do you think you're going?" She called angrily.

"It appears to be my lunch hour. GOTTA GO!" Izaya called back as he bolted out the front door.

Namie chased after him, but he was too far gone when she reached the hall.

Izaya was casually strolling through the streets of Ikebukuro looking for something to keep him from boredom. He saw a fancy antique shop and decided to have a bit of fun. He entered the shop and the owner was nowhere to be seen. He grinned. He walked over to the shelves and pushed them over. They pushed over another set of shelves as they fell. Soon there was a domino incident. Izaya was laughing so hard, he didn't notice the shop owner return.

"WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING TO MY MERCHANDISE?" The man screamed.

"Well you see, I was just-" Izaya began before darting out of the shop and returning back to his apartment.

When he re-entered his humble abode, Namie was napping on the couch. Izaya tip-toed into his kitchen and grabbed a snack, before going into his room and hiding from the soon to be awake Namie. Fifteen minutes passed and Izaya could hear commotion coming from his living room. He waited till it quieted down and then peeked out. Namie was gone. He decided he would check to make sure she was really gone. She was.

Namie was sitting in her favorite secret room, waiting for interesting entertainment.

Izaya calmed down and looked for something to do. He saw Namie's white lab coat and smiled. He grabbed it and tied it around his neck, before he proceeded to "fly" around like a super hero.

"Super Izaya to the rescue!" He shouted, running around his apartment. He then mimicked Namie's voice and screamed. "Super Izaya! Save me!" Izaya said, in his own voice," Of course I'll save you my dear." He said. He swooped down and someone started knocking on the door.

Izaya discarded the coat and ran to answer the door.

It was Shizuo.

"If it isn't my arch enime, The notorious, Doctor Shizu-Chan Heiwajima!" Izaya gasped.

"What? You truly are an idiot." Shizuo said, before looking around. "Where's Namie? I need to talk to her. And don't lie to me unless you want a repeat of last time!" He shouted.

Izaya instantly had a lash back. (Of last chapter when Shizuo kicked him in the groin) Izaya flinched.

"She's not here. I don't know where she is." Izaya said.

"Fine." Shizuo said as Izaya turned around and Shizuo entered the secret room.

Izaya grinned. "I know where you went Shizu-Chan" He thought.

Izaya was about to continue his little super hero game until, one of his many clients barged in.

"Izaya? I need to schedule an emergency appointment." The man said.

"For when?" Izaya asked, all trace of silliness gone from his voice.

"Tomorrow morning." Said the man.

"Alright…lets see…" Izaya began. He took out his appointment book and look for an opening. "Is 7:00 a.m. good?" Izaya asked.

"Yes. Thanks." Said the man.

The man turned to leave when Izaya ripped a big fart. The man turned and looked at Izaya.

Izaya looked back at the man. "It was you." Izaya said, with a straight face.

Namie and Shizuo couldn't believe what just happened. "Is he serious?" Namie asked Shizuo.

"He's an idiot. What do you expect?" Said Shizuo.

The two continued to watch the screens.

The man was walking out the door and Izaya looked as bored as ever. He walked into his living room and turned on the TV. "What the hell is this?" Asked Izaya. "What's up with the guy with the freaky closed eyes?" He continued to watch. "What the hell is a Philosophers stone?" Izaya wondered. Izaya jumped out of his seat. "Awesome! That guy can make fire from his fingers! I wanna do that! Then I'd finally destroy Shizu-chan!" Izaya laughed in what he thought was a menacing way. But it sounded more like an angry kitten.

Izaya then frowned when the credits started rolling. "Aw! Boo!" Izaya whined. The show was over. "Wonder what's next." He said aloud. The show began with a motorcycle and Izaya turned it off before he could see anything else. "Wow…that looked boring!" Izaya said. He went back into the office room and picked up the book, "_A Day In The Life Of A Fish_." He began to read the book out loud. "Swim. Swim. Swim. Swim. Swim. Poop. THE END." He picked up another. "_The Masturbating Pirate That Teaches Origami._" He began to read. "There once was a Pirate. Let's call him Captain Jerk Off. Captain Jerk Off was a notorious pirate who struck fear in the hearts of many. However he had a problem. He was addicted to masturbating. He also tought his ship mates origami. One day his first mate came and asked if he would make him a swan. So the Captain got to work. That's when his little problem kicked in. About 15 minute later, the captain presented the swan to his first mate. "CAPTAIN! YOU GOT SEMEN ALL OVER MY SWAN!" The captain looked at the swan. "Well what's a swan if its not white?" The End" Izaya looked at the book and laughed.

He was soon bored again and got on to the dollars website.

Kanra has logged on.

Kanra: Hey guys!

Saika: Hi there.

Taro Tanaka: Oh hi Kanra.

Setton: Hey.

Kanra: Guess what?

Setton: What?

Taro Tanaka: Huh?

Saika: What?

Kanra: I just read the best book ever!

Setton: A book? Really?

Kanra: What? It's a very good book.

Bakyura has logged on.

Kanra: Hey Bakyura? You know that book I have about the pirate?

Bakyura: Yeah.

Kanra: I finally read it. ^^

Bakyura: How was it?

Kanra: Awesome.

Kanra: Anyways I got to go. Later Gators.

Kanra has logged off.

Izaya then thought about what he would do. He got an idea. He had hired a girl to play along with his little funny business. He decided to make Namie think she was wrong. So he picked up his phone and called the girl.

"Hello?"

"It's me."

"Oh! Hi Izaya!"

"Hey there sexy."

"What can I do for you?"

"Why don't you come over here and I'll show you?"

"Okay. I'll be right over."

"See you then."

"See you."

15 minutes later there was a knock on the door.

Izaya invited the girl inside.

Namie stared at the girl. She had reddish-brown hair, green eyes, an hourglass figure and was wearing a little black dress.

"Hi Izaya." She smiled.

"Where is my kiss at?" He asked her.

She leaned in and kissed him on the lips.

"That's my girl." Smiled Izaya.

"I love you Izaya." She said.

"Love you too. So how did you manage to get away from your boyfriend?" Asked Izaya.

"I just told him I was going out with the girls." She laughed.

"What an idiot." Izaya chuckled.

"Yep. So anyways…what did you need?" She asked him.

Izaya walked over to his desk and sat in his chair. The motioned for her to join him.

So she did. She sat in his lap where they began to make out.

Namie and Shizuo began to gag. "She is nasty as hell. How could she even touch him?" Namie coughed out.

The girl then slid down behind the desk where Namie's camera's couldn't see her and Izaya began to make pleasured faces. He looked down and the girl who was trying not to laugh. She then felt buzzing in her pockets and stood up.

"It's my boyfriend. Gotta go Izaya. She kissed him and ran out the door.

"Did she just…?" Shizuo gagged.

Namie threw up in a bucket she had for times such as these.

Izaya then had a busy schedule for the rest of the day with clients. So he decided to spare his watchers. And was serious the rest of the day. But tomorrow he would be back with a vengeance.

A/N: Well there you have it. Chapter two. Give 10 reviews and I'll add another chapter.

Also, I'm sorry it ended this way but my aunt had writers block. Next chapter will make you pee your pants. Thanks for reading. ^^

REVIEW!


	3. Seiji Visits and Namie's gift

The Izaya Watching Room

Chapter 3

A/N: You all reviewed and here it is. Chapter 3!

In chapter 2, Izaya said he be back with a vengeance…and he will be.

Disclaimer: I do not own Durarara or it's characters.

Namie was already in her secret room. She got in there before Izaya woke up. She was impatient for what surprises the day would bring.

Izaya woke up and went to see if Namie was there, or in her room that he wasn't suppose to know about. After a while he assumed correctly that she was in the secret room. As he got ready for his day, he sang a little song.

"I am amazingly hot,

And Namie is so not.

I'm not in love with my sisters,

Namie is stuck on that Mr.

Not my sisters but others,

And Namie wants to kiss her brother.

Incest is all around town,

And all I have to do is turn around.

She is so gross,

I want to throw up!

Thaaaaat's Namie Yagiri.

The freakiest girl in the world."

~Namie wanted to kill him so much right now!~

Izaya could only laugh as he pictured Namie's face right then. "She probably wants to kill me." He thought. He walked over to his desk and sat in his chair. "How can I make her mad today?" He thought. Then he smiles evily. He reached for his phone and punched in the numbers. It wasn't long until he got an answer.

"Hello?"

"Hello, Seiji."

~Namie gasped in horror!~

"Who is this?"

"My name is Izaya Orihara. I'm your sister Namie's boss."

"Oh. Well is she in trouble or something?"

"No, no. Not at all. I was just wondering if you could come over to my office. There is something Namie wants me to give to you."

"Alright."

After the chat with Seiji, Izaya went out. He returned fifteen minutes later with a gift bag. Just in time too. Seiji knocked on his door a few moments later.

"Door is open. Come on in Seiji." Izaya called from his couch.

Seiji opened the door and came in. He walked over to the couch and sat next to Izaya.

"What is it my sister wanted me to have?" Seiji asked.

~In the secret room, Namie was wondering the same thing.~

Izaya gave Seiji the gift bag and handed him a card. He read the card out loud.

"Dear Seiji, I know we don't get to see each other that often. I want you to have this so that you know I'm always here for you. With much love, your sister, Namie. XOXO."

Seiji removed the tissue paper and took out the black fabric. He held it up and screamed. He fell to the ground and began to gag. For the gift was a XXXL black lacy thong, with the name "Namie Yagiri" on the front. They were also a bit stained in the crotch section. Seiji stood up with his hands over his mouth and his face was rapidly turning greener by the second.

"The bathroom is over there." Izaya told him pointing to a door.

Seiji ran at top speed to the bathroom and began vomiting violently.

Izaya smiled in victory. He remembered how he go those panties stained. Any idiot could figure it out. All he did was, take them and pour ketchup, mustard, and chocolate in the crotch of the garment. He then washed them in a polluted river. Then just for kicks, he put some of his own pubes in the stitching to make them looked used, before drying them off on a dead skunk.

Seiji finally came out of the bathroom and collapsed on the floor. "My sister has some serious issues. I mean, what's with all the incest crap? I wouldn't choose her if she were the last, 'thing' on this planet." Seiji groaned out.

~Namie gets out her Izaya Voodoo doll and stabs him repeatedly with pins!~

"Yes I know Seiji." Izaya told the teen. Izaya helped Seiji to the door and then closed it. He went into the bathroom to make sure Seiji didn't miss the toilet. He didn't. But the smell of puke was so strong, Izaya threw up and did miss the toilet. Izaya didn't want to dirty any of his towels. So he walked out into his living room and grabbed Namie's favorite sweater that she always forgot at his place. He returned to the bathroom and used the sweater to soak up all of his puke. He took the sweater back out in to the living room and wrapped it up inside of Namie's lab coat, then he placed the coat under the couch. "She's not going to like this."

Namie couldn't take it anymore and came out of her room without Izaya seeing her. When he turned around, she was coming over to him. When she was right in front of him, he slid his finger across her face….they were wet.

"Ew! IZAYA? WHAT WAS THAT?" She asked him.

Izaya smiled. "I'll give you a hint. What licks his fingers and then pokes his butt? It was my salvia butt finger!" Izaya stated proudly.

Namie fainted.

She was out all day.

"Oh well. More fun for tomorrow." Izaya smiled widely. "When will she learn? As soon as she gets rid of her room, I'll stop acting like an idiot?"

A/N: I know…it was short. But hey…it's not easy when I used most of the good stuff in the first chapter. I promise I'll do some serious brainstorming. Okay? Reviews are encouraged! If I get 15 reviews…I'll do another chapter with my brainstormed ideas. REVIEW ^^


	4. Izaya's cold and Pervy Simon

The Izaya Watching Room

Chapter 4

A/N: Here it is! The awaited chapter 4! I know the last chapter was short, which is why my aunt Ashley, started typing this right after she posted the last one.

Izaya was asleep in his room when Namie showed up for work. When she entered the apartment, Izaya was nowhere to be found. She looked in every room until she found him.

"What is he still doing in bed?" She wondered. She walked over to his bedside and glared down at him. He was talking in his sleep.

"I finally got you Shizu-chan! Any last words?" He mumbled.

Namie scoffed and pushed him off his bed. He landed on the floor with a flump. Izaya opened his eyes and got up.

"Namie? Why did you do-do-Achoo-that?" Izaya asked.

Izaya didn't look so good.

"Izaya do you have a cold? I'll be so mad if I catch your cold." She glared at him from a distance.

"Yes I do. Big freaking deal Namie." Izaya snuffled.

"Well, whatever. I'm going to go if your sick." She said heading for the door.

Izaya stopped her. "Namie? Could you do me a solid and go pick up some cough medicine for me?" He asked.

"Fine." She said leaving.

Izaya looked over to his cat. "Mayonaka? Why is Namie such a brat?" He asked the fur ball. The cat rubbed up against him and meowed. "Nya."

"Ah your just a cat. What do you know?" Izaya asked. Izaya sat down on his couch and fell over. "I feel like dookie." He whined before falling asleep.

He was out for two hours before Namie returned. She saw him asleep and woke him up. She handed him the medicine he asked for and went into his kitchen to get a spoon. She came back and poured some onto the spoon and put it up to Izaya's closed mouth.

"Izaya take your medicine." She told him calmly.

"What flavor is it?" He asked her.

"Orange." She told him.

"Gah! Namie! What are you trying to do poison me? I hate orange!" Izaya stated stubbornly.

"I don't care! You're going to take this medicine and you're going to like it." She said and forced it into Izaya's mouth.

Izaya spat it out all over Namie's face. Namie growled and Izaya ran away from her. Namie chased him. "No!" Izaya screamed.

"Take it!" Namie yelled.

"Noooooo!" Izaya protested.

Izaya stopped and sneezed and Namie took that opportunity to jump on Izaya and pin him down. "NOW TAKE IT!" Namie screamed. And when he opened his mouth to protest further, she poured some in his mouth and held her hand over his mouth, to prevent him from spitting it out. He swallowed it. "Mmmm…not bad." Izaya smiled.

Namie smacked him and got up. "Izaya? You're an idiot." She said.

Izaya got up and smiled. "I'm going to go change out of this medicine stained outfit. I suggest you go do the same." Izaya said going into his room.

Namie took that as her chance to go to her secret room.

When Izaya was all changed, he came out and noticed Namie was gone. "Oh Namie…you never do learn, do you?" He said too quietly for her microphones to pick up. He then went over to his computer and sat in his comfy chair. "Lets see…how will I test her today?" He wondered. He didn't think the medicine was working. He still felt horrible. He got out of his chair and went into the living room. He turned on the TV and laid down on the couch.

His favorite show came on again. "Hey it's the freaky closed eyes guy again!" Izaya smiled. He watched a bit more. "Oh! His name is Ling Yao." He smiled. He watched that show until it ended and then turned it off before the motorcycle show (Durarara for those of you who haven't figured it out) came on. He sat up and sneezed twice in a row. He looked around for a tissue but there were none around. Then he spotted Namie's lab coat. She had just had it dry-cleaned, so it should be good.

He blew his nose on her coat.

~Namie was furious! "I cant believe he got his nasty mucus all over my coat! I don't have the time to clean it again!"~

When he was done, he threw the coat over his shoulder. He got up off the couch and went back into the other room.

Before he could see her, Namie emerged from the secret room and got right up in Izaya's face.

"WHY DID YOU SNEEZE INTO MY COAT?" She screamed.

Izaya smirked. "How would you know if I did or not? You weren't here….or were you?" Izaya asked.

Namie walked over to her coat and picked it up. "Look right here! There is mucus all over it! And I know for a fact that it wasn't me! And since you're the only person here, it must have been you." She said.

On the couch, Mayonaka sneezed and Izaya pointed to him. "Maybe it was him."

Namie wanted to kill him. "It was not the cat! It was you!" She hollered.

"Got any proof?" Izaya asked.

"Yes I do!" She screamed. Then she realized what she had said.

"Oh? Then where is this 'proof'?" He smiled.

Namie gave in. "Alright I don't have any proof. But I know it was you." She said.

Izaya turned and went into his room to look for a box of tissues. Namie went back into her room. "That was a close one. I almost blabbed about the room." She sighed.

There were no tissues in his room. So he went back into the front room. Izaya was getting hungry. He couldn't leave the apartment while he was sick though. And Namie was to busy being somewhere else to get him something. He didn't feel like cooking either. So, Izaya got his phone out and dialed the Russia Sushi place.

"Hello this is Russia Sushi. How may I help you today?"

"Hey Simon. It's Izaya."

"Oh hi Izaya."

"Hey listen Simon, could you do me a favor?"

"Depends on what it is."

"Well you see I'm sick and I cant leave my apartment. And I'm really hungry for your fatty tuna. Could you please come and deliver me some? I'll pay extra."

"Well if you pay extra, then okay."

"Thanks Simon."

Izaya hung up and waited until Simon showed up.

When he did, he thanked Simon and paid him. He invited him in for a few minutes.

"So Izaya? I heard you got a secretary." Simon said.

"Yeah. I did. She is super sexy too." Izaya grinned.

~Namie was dumbfounded~

"Whets her name?" Asked Simon.

"Namie Yagiri. And if I must say, she's a stone cold fox." Izaya said.

"She got nice body?" Asked Simon.

"Yeah. Very nice body. But her stupid clothes are always obstructing the best views. I mean, I cant even get a good look at her cleavage because she wears a damned turtle neck." Izaya said.

"You know Izaya, there is a way to get rid of that problem." Simon smiled in a pervy way.

"Really? You must tell me Simon."

Simon began to whisper in Izaya's ear.

"Thanks Simon." Izaya smiled.

"Well I got to go back to work. Stay out of trouble Izaya." Said Simon, walking out the door.

Izaya smiled. "Oh Namie, I cant wait to see you fully." Izaya grinned, then sneezed.

A/N: Well it seems Simon has a bit of a perverted side, eh? Anyway…if you want to know what happens when Izaya takes Simons advice…REVIEW! There might be a bit of a lime in the next chapter. Please review? Please? R-E-V-I-E-W!


	5. Putting the plan into action

The Izaya Watching Room

Chapter 5

A/N: Here it is…CHAPTER 5!

Izaya was waiting the next morning for Namie to show up to work. She was running really late. But, Izaya had a sly smile on his face because he knew what was keeping her. The day before, Simon gave him some advice…and he took it. Now he was just waiting to see if Simon's brilliant idea worked or not.

He didn't have to wait long until Namie showed up. She came in and his eyes almost popped out of his head. Her cleavage was showing. He smiled wickedly. "Well, well, well Namie. Dressed to kill today aren't you?" He chuckled.

Namie glared at him. "I know you're behind this." She hissed. She walked over to the table and sat down. Izaya couldn't take his eyes off her. "I am not going to give her a chance to go into that stupid room of hers today." He thought. "I don't want to miss one second of this. Why is it that she's never looked so appealing to me before? Hmmm."

Izaya got out of his chair and opened his mouth, when he should have kept it shut.

"So Namie tell me something…are you revealing your cleavage to me on purpose? So that you might seduce me into giving you a raise?" Izaya asked, grinning like an idiot.

Namie took a new copy of War and Peace out of her bag and threw it at him. Bulls eye. It hit him square in the jaw.

"Ouch! What was that for Namie? It was just a question!" Izaya asked, rubbing his chin.

"Stop being an ass! I would never seduce YOU Izaya." Namie spat.

Izaya chuckled. "You might not try to seduce me my dear, but I will seduce you." He thought to himself.

Izaya walked behind the couch Namie was sitting on and put his chin on her shoulder.

"What are you doing?" He whispered in her ear, giving her goose bumps.

"Ignoring you." She said.

"Well you cant ignore me if you're talking to me." Izaya said.

"What do you want Izaya?" She asked.

"I want you Namie." Izaya said, nuzzling the back or her ear with his nose.

She turned to smack him, but when she did her lips collided with his.

He smirked into the accidental kiss. She pulled away. "Well I suppose I was right, Namie. You are trying to seduce me."

Izaya's comment was rewarded with a slap to the face. He chuckled.

"Go be stupid somewhere else." Namie snapped.

What she really wanted him to do was leave the room, if even for a second. But Izaya wasn't going to leave her alone.

It wasn't long before she stood up and went into the kitchen. Izaya followed right behind her.

"What are you doing now Namie?" Izaya asked her. She was pulling things out of the cabinets.

"What does it look like I'm doing Izaya? I'm making some lunch." She said, rolling her eyes.

"Great! I'm starving!" Izaya smiled, grabbing a fork and a knife.

Namie stared at him. "Who said I was making lunch for you?" She asked coldly.

"Well you see Namie, this is my apartment, therefore, all the food here is mine as well. So you have two options, one, make me some lunch too, or two, don't eat at all. It's very simple." Izaya smirked, making her mumble something that sounded like 'annoying idiot', and 'I hate you, Izaya'.

Namie got out more ingredients and began preparing their lunch. She got out the pots and pans and began to make it. While she cooked, Izaya kept looking over her shoulder as if what she was doing was mesmerizing. She began to grow agitated with his presence so close behind her.

"Izaya go find something to entertain yourself with. Lunch wont be ready for a half hour." Namie sighed.

Izaya really thought if he were to leave the room, she would escape. Izaya sighed. "Oh well."

He decided that there was always a way to get her out of that stupid room anyway. As he was headed towards his front door, Mayonaka started meowing. "Nya. Nya. Nya." He looked down at the feline and instantly knew what the cat wanted. He walked into the kitchen and got out a can of cat food. He pulled the tab and poured it into the cats dish. He then refilled the water dish and went to leave again.

He was walking through Ikebukuro and was actually minding his own business, (For once) when he was almost hit with a flying vending machine. "IZAYA!" Shizuo yelled. "STAY OUT OF IKEBUKURO!" Shizuo said as he began to chase after Izaya. Izaya however didn't move and Shizuo was face to face with him in an instant.

"I don't have time to play with you today, Shizu-chan. I got to pick up some flowers for Namie and head back home for lunch." Izaya said, as he casually walked away. Shizuo just stood there watching Izaya leave with an odd look on his face. "That was weird."

Izaya picked up some flowers and headed back to his apartment where the lunch was finally done. Namie didn't escape either. "Here Namie. These are for you." He said handing her the flowers. "Step one in the seducing of the Yagiri: Complete." Izaya thought as he and Namie ate.

After lunch was over, Namie came up to Izaya and asked what the flowers were for. "They're for you Namie. Oh and I also re-dry-cleaned your white lab coat." Izaya told her.

She actually smiled. "Thanks Izaya." She said.

"Step two: Complete." Izaya thought.

Namie didn't know what had gotten into her employer. "He is actually being nice. He must be up to something." Namie thought suspiciously, glancing at her boss.

Izaya went and got on his computer and logged on to the dollars website.

Kanra has logged on.

Setton: Hi Kanra.

Kanra: Oh hi Setton. Is it just you on today?

Setton. Yes.

Kanra: I see. I have a question for you Setton.

Setton: What is it?

Kanra: You're a girl right?

Setton: Yeah.

Kanra: Well I'm a guy.

Setton: I'm sorry Kanra but I'm already in a happy relationship.

Kanra: Oh no. That's not it. I was just wondering what kinds of things you ladies like.

Setton: Why?

Kanra: Well there's this woman I work with…

Setton: I see. Well women love sensitivity. Try being nice and showering her with gifts.

Kanra: Thanks Setton. I got to go now.

Setton: Good luck.

Kanra: Thanks.

Kanra has logged off.

Izaya looked over to Namie and got a sneaky little grin on his face. "You will be mine soon Namie. I promise you that."

A/N: I know I said there might be a lime in this chapter, but I need to work up to it. I'm sorry! It should be in one of the next two chapters. Thanks for reading. REVIEW PLEASE!


	6. A BIG Secret!

The Izaya Watching Room

Chapter 7

A/N: Thanks for the reviews!

Namie woke up before Izaya the next morning. She lay there in bed and knew something was off. She couldn't quite figure out what it was. That was until she rolled over and saw 'his' black hair. She quickly got out of bed, ran to his bathroom and got into the shower. "I was hoping that was a nightmare." She thought to herself, as she furiously scrubbed the "Izaya" germs off.

Izaya woke up when he no longer felt warmth next to him. He looked over and noticed Namie was missing. He got up to look for her when he heard the shower and grinned. "I wonder where Namie is." He said to himself and creped up to the door. Very quietly, Izaya opened the door and tip-toed up to the foggy shower doors. He quickly opened the door and Namie screamed.

Izaya walked out of his bathroom with a big, red, handprint on his right cheek. "She's got her panties in a twist." Izaya said to himself as he got dressed and went into the kitchen. He made himself and Namie omelets. She came out shortly in spare clothes she always kept there in case of an emergency. "I hate you!" She told him as she sat down. "I love you too." Izaya grinned.

They ate in silence. "I'll give you this Izaya, you sure can make a good omelet." She said. "Yes, I guess you could say, that they're practically orgasmic." Izaya chuckled. Namie spat her food out. "Speaking of which, give me one good reason why I shouldn't sue you for sexual harassment." Namie hissed.

"Because you love me. Why else?" Izaya smiled.

Namie got up and put her dish in the sink, then headed into her secret room.

Izaya finished up and went after Namie. But she was gone when he got out there. Izaya shook his head. "Oh Namie, why must you hide your feelings for me?"

Izaya was all alone now and was beginning to get silly ideas in his head. He would annoy Namie in a way that would disturb her to no end.

Izaya sat in his chair and thought out loud. "I wonder if Namie and I should have a baby?"

-Namie went wide-eyed. "You better think again you flea."-

"I wonder, would we have a boy or girl? What would we name it?" Izaya's ego was glowing when he though of the faces Namie was making. "Oh! We would have to get married! That would be a most happy occasion!" Izaya grinned.

-Namie though otherwise. "There is no way I would ever have his kid!" Namie promised herself.-

Izaya was becoming bored very quickly. He didn't know what to do to entertain himself. He was about ready to give up and just go back to bed when, someone started knocking on his door. Before he could even get up to open the door, Mairu and Kururi came inside. Izaya smiled wider. If there was one thing he knew about his sisters, it was that they loved secrets. And they could keep them when bribed properly.

"Mairu? Kururi? Could you two come here please? I got a secret for you two." Izaya smiled.

The twins rushed over to Izaya as fast as they possibly could. "What is it? Tell us!" They smiled viciously.

"Calm down. I just need your word that you wont tell anyone." Izaya said.

"Hmmm…I don't know Izaya. What's in it for us?" Mairu asked.

Izaya sighed. "What do you two want?"

The girls whispered in Izaya's ear what they required.

"Fine! I'll get it for you two. But if you so much as breath a word I'll take it back." Izaya warned them.

"We wont. We promise." They said together.

Izaya smiled. He lent down and whispered something in their ears. They blushed bright red.

"Are you serious?" Kururi asked with a smile on her face.

"Yes." Izaya told her.

"This is great! How many? Do you know?" Mairu asked.

"No idea." Izaya said.

"This is the best secret ever Izaya! Thanks for telling us!" The girls smiled and hugged their brother.

"Does that mean that I don't have to get it for you?" Izaya asked.

The twins thought about it. "Yes. You still do." They told him.

"Anyway…why are you two here in the first place?" Izaya asked them.

"Huh? Oh! I almost forgot. We need you to sign a permission slip." Kururi told him.

"For what exactly?" Izaya questioned.

"Field trip." Mairu answered.

Izaya took the piece of paper that his sisters gave him, and quickly scribbled his name on them.

"There." Izaya said handing the papers to them.

"Thanks." They smiled and ran out the door. But not without first kissing their brother on the cheek.

Izaya shook his head after they were gone. "What am I going to do with those two?" He wondered.

Izaya's thoughts were soon on the secret he told them. "How am I going to survive this one? I might be able to visit Ikebukuro without Shizu-chan trying to kill me. Hmmm…maybe. I'm going to have very busy nights and days. Namie is not going to like this. Not one bit." And that thought made Izaya smile like the cat that that just ate the canary.

He began to think out loud. "Shinra will love this! He'll bother me about it non-stop. Shizu-chan will never let me weasel my way out of it. Celty will also get a kick out of it. Simon will probably laugh and tell me I'm doomed. And in a way he will be right. Maybe it wasn't such a good idea. What am I going to do now?" Izaya was puzzled. He had never been more confused.

He picked up his phone and called Namie."What do you want?" She asked him.

"I need you to come here Namie." Izaya told her.

"Fine. I'm on my way." She said.

Izaya turned to face the window so she could "Sneak" out of the secret room.

She opened the front door and shut it. She walked up to his desk.

"What is it Izaya?" She asked.

"Could you please make some tea and get me some aspirin? I would do it myself but, I have such a head-ach, that I'd probably burn the building down in the process." He told her seriously.

She sighed and went into the kitchen and began the tea. Once it was boiling, she got the bottle of pills and gave them to Izaya. She went back into the kitchen and got a cup of tea for Izaya. She went back into the other room and gave it to him. Izaya took the pills and drank his tea. Then went to lay down on the couch.

As Izaya lay there…the secret popped back into his mind. He smiled. "Maybe it wont be too bad." He thought as he drifted off to sleep.

A/N: Well there it is. Whoever can guess what the secret is first, will be mentioned in the next chapter. However I wont post the next chapter until I receive 20 reviews! So…you know…REVIEW! Tell your friends to review to get these chapters faster.


	7. The Big Secret Revealed!

Chapter 8

The next morning, Namie sat there completely confused. "What's the big secret?" She wondered. She attempted to get information out of the information broker.

"Izaya?" She asked him.

"What Namie?" He asked.

"Anything interesting going on?" She asked.

Izaya knew what she was doing. "Nope. Not really. Why?" He asked.

"Never mind. I was just curious." She said.

Weeks went by and she still couldn't get him to spill it. She gave up.

She came in one morning, looking a bit green.

"Are you feeling alright Namie?" Izaya asked, smirking.

"No. I was throwing up all morning." Namie said.

Izaya chuckled.

Namie noticed. "What's so funny?" She asked him.

"Nothing." Izaya sighed.

"Do you think it's funny that I'm sick?" She asked.

"No." He said.

"Then what?" She asked irritated.

"I already told you it's nothing." He smiled.

"IZAYA!" She yelled.

"Yes?" He asked innocently.

"I swear I will get you sick, if you don't tell me what's so damn funny.!" She screamed.

Izaya burst out laughing." N-Namie? You can't get me sick. What you have isn't contagious." He fell off his chair.

Namie was very confused now. "What are you talking about?" She asked.

"Maybe you should go see a doctor. Better yet, I'll call Shinra." Izaya snickered as he pulled his phone out of his pocket and dialed the number.

"Hello?"

"Shinra? You should come over here. You'd get a kick out of this." Izaya said.

"What is it?"

"Namie Yagiri needs a doctor. She doesn't know what's wrong with her. But I do."

"If you know, then why do I need to come over?"

"She might take it better if you tell her. Besides, like I said, you'd get a kick out of it."

\"Fine. I'll be right over."

Izaya hung up and looked at Namie who was completely puzzled.

It wasn't long before Shinra showed up.

"Where is she?" Shinra asked.

"Over there." Izaya pointed to Namie who was sitting on the couch. Shinra and Izaya walked over to her and sat down.

"What seems to be the problem?" Shinra asked.

"I've been throwing up all morning. I was thinking it was the flu. But then Izaya told me it wasn't contagious." Namie explained.

"Anything else?"

"Not really." She said.

Shinra thought really hard and grinned. "Namie? Have you been intimate lately?"

She gave Izaya a disgusted look. "Yes."

Shinra laughed. It's morning sickness. You're pregnant Namie." Shinra smiled.

Namie turned green and threw up on Izaya. He wiped it off.

"No! This can't be happening! I don't want to have that man's baby! I don't!" Namie panicked.

"Who's?" Shinra asked.

Izaya tapped him on the shoulder, getting his attention. "Mine."

Shinra froze and then jumped up. "Oh wow! This is fantastic! Izaya? You're going to be a father!" Izaya laughed like a maniac.

Namie looked frightened of Shinra. "It could be worse Namie." Izaya told her.

"What could possibly be worse that being pregnant with your kid?" She screamed.

Izaya pointed to Shinra. "You could be having his."

"Good point. But still how could you do this to me? I hardly have enough money to get by as it is. I cant afford this kid!"

Izaya sighed as Namie ranted on.

"My apartment is too small…"

"Namie?" Izaya asked, but she wasn't paying attention.

"Then there's the medical bills…"

"Namie?"

"Then the insurance and money for school…"

"NAMIE!" Izaya screamed.

"What?" Namie screamed back.

"Don't worry. The kid is mine too ya know. I'll pay for everything it needs. And since I have a large apartment…you'll just have to move in with me."

As much as she hated the idea of living with 'him', she knew it was for the best.

"So tell me, is this the secret you've been keeping from me?" She asked.

Izaya laughed. "Nope." He smiled.

"Izaya? I'm not going to have triplets am I?"

Izaya went wide-eyed. "Nothing THAT bad."

"Good." She said.

"So when do you want to move in when with me?" Izaya smiled, receiving a slap from Namie.

"I was being serious." Izaya added.

She thought about it. "Next week."

"Alright! So much to do and only seven and a half months to do it in!" Izaya went down the mental list. "Let's see…we need…diapers…baby powder…baby lotion…a crib…a stroller…baby clothes…pacifiers…bottles…formula…unless you plan on breast-feeding…which would be hot."

Namie threw a look at him.

"Alright…formula? …hmm…pending. We'll need to think of names. Oh! We need to get married Namie! Unless you want people to think you're a slut." Izaya laughed.

Namie's face turned bright red. "No!"

"Do you want people to think you're a slut?" he asked her.

"No Izaya I don't! But I don't want a wedding!" She growled.

"Too bad Namie."

"Fine! You already ruined my life. Why not ruin it even more?" Namie sighed.

"That's the spirit Namie!" Izaya smiled.

"Namie got an idea. "Hey Izaya? Since we're getting married, I don't think we should have any secrets between us." She said.

"I totally agree." Izaya smiled.

"Then tell me…what is the big secret?" Namie asked.

"You're having twins!" Izaya laughed.

A/N: Yes I know it took me forever to post this, but my computer crashed. Luckily I got it fixed. I have some important information. My aunt, the one who wrote this story, is getting her own account on Fan fiction soon. This story will continue on her account. It will be called, "T.I.W.R." Anyways…review.


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